Floral Designs by Andi Marquette

Floral Designs by Andi Marquette

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


A lovely little story set during and around Valentine's day. The lead main character (and only point of view character) is content to be by herself - nein, she prefers doing things that others just don't understand, that really does like doing certain things sans companion. She's not asexual or aromantic, though, and has had relationships in the past.

One such relationship is now just a friendship. And that friend seems bound and determined to get her friend someone to love, and/or, at the very least, play with. Romantically and/or sexually. Debbie, the friend, remains Marissa's friend, the main character, despite this inability to stop trying to find said 'someone to play with'. The woman Debbie has picked to thrust at Marissa this time, for . . . was it months? is a 'too cute for her own good butch woman', Marissa's words (to herself), and too much of a 'flavor of the month' type (again, Marissa's impression/words to herself).

Things might have rested there, with Marissa having her friend occasionally thrusting people, or more specifically Gabriela at Marissa, with Marissa reacting with disdain and shudders. But then Gabriela, seemingly outside Debbie's influences ('seemingly?', well yes - she does something on her own, but I can't say with certainty that Debbie might not have provided a nudge one way or another), begins to interact with Marissa. Which, actually, initially reinforces some of Marissa's negative attitude towards Gabriela, though also begins to break down Marissa's wall.

Marissa is a florist. It's Valentine Season. And Gabriela has asked Marissa's help with putting together a special flower arrangement for a particular woman - who is not actually Gabriela's current girlfriend, but instead current potential.

Lovely little story, quite enjoyable.

Rating: 4.89

April 7 2018



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Halloween Pony by I. Binder

I'm in the vaguely confused situation wherein I am fairly certain I wrote a review (strong sense I attempted to spell the game the two main characters played, but had to double check the spelling), but do not see one here now, plus, I do not actually recall rating this story this highly.  5+ stars? Seriously? Shesh.

A man and a woman play a game.  She's drunk. He's . . .it's not stated.  They've been dating for a while. She's a teenager.  He's creepily older than her. Like, 30+ year old dating a 18 year older creepy.  I do not recall which game in particular they play, nor if she ever had success against him playing the game. But she's feeling recklessly overconfident, so agrees to a bet.  He'll give her enough money to go to college if she wins; she'll wear a costume he picks out for her for a Halloween party (I forgot to include: 'he's filthy rich, she's cleanly poor (what, we doing opposites, yes? What's the opposite of filthy rich?  Well, she doesn't have money, 'k?)'; is instant red flag if one side of a wager is some massively generous reward, and other side is something 'minor').

Woman, as expected, loses.  All of this mentioned in passing, I don't think it was actually mentioned in detail though.  Woman doesn't mind, really - she's going to be able to go to a Halloween party, which should be great, and all she has to do is wear whatever he picks out. How bad can it be?

Day of party occurs. She arrives early to get into the costume; she has no clue what he chose for her.  She's the kind to be, apparently, constantly aroused.  He keeps her on the peak of arousal as he provides her with the costume, and she puts it on.  Talking her into doing certain things she might otherwise not do but for being so aroused. Like put on the costume sans undergarments (has the costume been used before? Has it at least been cleaned? Bare skin against rented costume? nooooo).  She might be quite aroused, but she's still aware enough of her surroundings to notice that her nipples and breasts are kind of very visible in this costume.  He makes some off hand comment about how he'll take care of things.  She, being really horny, continues to put on costume.  Assumes she'll put it on, they'll fuck, she'll then get him to add things - like . . . um, well, better cover for her breasts. I forget what all else.

While still on the peak of arousal, he binds up her arms, restrains her, and shoves a gag like thingie into her mouth.  Then proceeds to lead her outside. She's, understandably, freaking out by this point.

Whereupon he leashes her to some post like thing outdoors. Then leaves. Vehicle arrives. She's horrified/embarrased/incredibly pissed off.  People exit the vehicle. It's a horse . . . um . . . use my words . . . horse trailer thingie. The type of thing you transport horses in.  The people from the vehicle, the front part at least, proceed to remove three women dressed like the main female character of the story.  I failed to mention how she's dressed, yes? hmms. Right, so, she's been dressed up like a ponygirl (I also forgot to mention that he did actually tell her how he was going to dress her, I'd forgotten - so, forget what I said before about her not knowing -> she'd no clue what he meant, and was vaguely interested how she'd be dressed like a pony. Especially as there's just one of her, and most pony costumes she knew of previously involved someone wearing a horse head, and someone else wearing horse rear; that's not the kind of pony she's dressed up like).

One thing leads to another - and I interject two things: the woman is deeply annoyed/angry/etc. about everything going on; deeply aroused - and the exposed woman is attached to a two ponygirl cart.  And proceeds to be forced to transport people longish distance from gate up to house. While being whipped.

Other stuff happens. Like a roommate appearing, and complications, and stuff. And people talking about her right in front of her, without actually talking to her. Etc.etc.

How the bloody hell did I end up rating this 5+ stars?  eh, meh, pfft.

This is one of those niche type stories that is not for everyone. On many levels. Immature people below a certain age should not read this. Mature people of any age should probably not read this. People looking for graphic depictions of sex . . . should look elsewhere.  People looking for an almost fetish-like devotion to descriptions of binding/deeply detailed and extensively detailed descriptions of leather and buckles, and bits, and bindings/etc. should look elsewhere.  I'm not exactly sure whose left in the possible reading audience, but them, they should read this. *nods*  (I have left a lot, I figured I didn't need to continue down a list, I'd never finish, infinite list - 'those who like cat stories shouldn't look here' (well, the roommate is wearing a cat costume, but . . . ); 'those who like horror should not . . . ' (well, there's a tinge of psychological horror but . . . ) etc. etc.).

Rating: WTF I rated it before.

April 4 2018

Elfin Magic by R.G. Emanuelle

After reading one of the free short stories by this author released by Dirt Road Books, I promptly read another.  By the same author I mean.  Even though I was somewhat disappointed in the first I’d read.

It’s March and I’m reading a Christmas story. Heh.

Right, so, another solo point of view story – from the point of view of an elf – or, at least, a woman who wears an elf costume at a department story during the holidays to work the register in the little hut that processes photos taken with Satan.  Yes, bring your kids to see Satan. Bah. I mean Santa, of course. Stupid fingers not type what I want (and yes, I’ve fought them to actually write all rest, they wanted to type ‘time’ instead of ‘type’ earlier, among other things . . . dangnabbit, stop removing my spaces, fingers!)

While her stomach rumbles (a reoccurring theme for this author? Hehe, I joke with myself, just noticing a reoccurring plot point in two stories read on same day), the woman plans to go on break. But wait! There’s a gorgeous woman who is next!  POV woman (and here remember people’s names would be nice, I think her ‘elf’ name was something like Jangles, and her human name was something like Maddy, but I might be wrong about both) and gorgeous woman (whose name escapes me completely) flirt.

Then, I think it’s the next day, that same woman returns.  Sans kid.  Asks if POV woman is about to have a break.

The two sneak into an out of the way area that consists of a den of bears.  Stuffed bears. Graphic depiction of sex may or may not occur, with some odd bell ringing, and almost constant mental reminders that they have a thin layer of bears (and. . . other stuff) between them and the public).

Despite not much happening in this story, it seemed a lot more complete than the other story I read by this author today. Much more satisfying; much less of a teaser.

Rating: 3.75

March 28 2018

Season's Meetings by Andi Marquette

My fourth short story read today, and second involving a Christmas theme. Odd.  Right, so, this is another of those free short stories findable on the Dirt Road Books website.

Rae is attempting to fly to California to be with sister and her kids for Christmas. But the story starts with her at the airport watching as her flight moves from delayed to cancelled.  While waiting in line at the airline desk, Rae interacts with ‘art gallery woman’, aka Erika.  They flirt.  Rae isn’t 100% certain if they are or are not actually flirting.  She does feel sparks in her intestines though (well, sparks are mentioned, I forget where they were striking her). 

Luckily for Rae, the mountain of snow fell on the airport where she lives (well, she lives in Washington DC and this is Reagan she’s at, but it’s one of the two regional airports, if you don’t include BWI, which is really close, really, so there’s like – at least, three regional airports, though I say regional but I think all of them are international. Is Dulles considered International? I don’t remember.  Ah, it is, though Reagan is considered national not international; did the story call Reagan an international airport? I don’t’ remember).

My reviews sometimes seem like I just opened my brain and dumped whatever was in there onto the screen.  They ramble, but, no, there generally is some filtering. The above was an example of the unfiltered version. 

And now I’ve forgotten what I’ve written.

Rae, while at Reagan National Airport two days before Christmas, watches as the announcement board moves her flight status from delayed to cancelled. There’s, like, a mountain of snow outside.  She informs certain people, like her sister, before moving over to the airline desk to see about what’s next.  While in line, she interacts with a woman she calls ‘art gallery woman’ because of the way she’s dressed.

Later, Rae gives Erika a ride from the airport to her, Erika’s, hotel.  And they interact/flirt more.  A spark is sparked.  A fire is fired.  A pickle is pickled. Okay, I do not know where I’m attempting to go there.

Now this one, of the four short stories I’ve read today, is the fullest most complete short story that I’ve read. Today.  Quite satisfying.  Not sexually explicit.  Except for the kissing. 

Rating: 4.44

March 28 2018

Do You Feel What I Feel edited by Jae and Fletcher Delancey

Do you feel what I feel: A Holiday Anthology by Jae

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


Book received from Ylva Publishing for an honest review

12 short stories by 12 different authors. A mix of authors who I have read before with authors who I have yet to sample. And a short story is something like a sample, an appetizer instead of a full meal. All 12 stories have a holiday theme. Not sure if that means that they all take place in December; all involve Christmas; or what exactly (ETA: I was going to adjust this after I read the anthology, but I still don't know if everything takes place in December, though I know not all involve Christmas). I know 4 have Christmas or Claus in the title. And one has lots of snow in the story itself, though never mentions Christmas or any holiday (though that's also the story with the ultra-right wing Christian fundamentalist family).

S. Claus by Blythe Rippon
North Pole, World Travel, Magic, Talking Caribou, Santa Claus; Solo POV

Selene Claus is Santa Claus' sister. She's quite jealous of Santa and sees him in a negative light. She plans to 'get back' at him by making him look bad in the eyes of the world. She plans to do that with magic, and a talking caribou - Rudolf's granddaughter Lara. Complicating Selene's plans is the appearance of Zaida, Santa's wife's sister.

There's not much to the story but I rather enjoyed it. I've slowly lowered my rating from my initial enthusiastic rating, and hopefully I'm 'close' to where I should be with my rating (should be as in my real rating for the story).

This is potentially an 'age gap' story, but Zaida's age was never given. If I understand correctly, Selene's about 100. 50 in a photo that might itself be 50 years old.

Rating: 4.88

This Thing by Jove Belle
Age Gap; Single Mother; Tattoo Artist; Reality Star; Multiple POV

I've gone the opposite direction with this story, raising the rating a little after my initial low rating.

So, there's this 'Beth' and a 'Willa'. Beth is a tattoo artist & Single mother who, on a dare, asked out a reality show star (who is also, presumably, at least 8 to ten years younger than her). That reality star being Willa. Who works in her parents gun shop and on her parent's reality show. Apparently they, the parents, signed up for this show when Willa was in high school. She's college age now (I forget if it was worded as 'college age' or 'in college now'), and so has more on-camera time. Which was apparently important to note in the story.

Willa's family is ultra-religious and conservative (I don't watch reality shows myself, but the few that I've heard mentioned, here or there, always seem to have that pattern - ultra-religious and conservative, at least the family focused ones (though even as I write this, several people pop into my brain - hard to know if they fit the pattern without watching the show, but I think there might be some that don't fit the pattern). Willa's ultra-guilty about spending time with Beth, but just loves doing so. Plus she also really loves guns.

I know I've mentioned something about age up above, giving the impression that we are reading about two mature fully functioning adults but . . . both of the main characters read as if they are lustful 15 year olds. Not even just because of their thoughts/words/actions between each other, but also their interactions with others. Like, for example, Beth seems weird in relation to her tattoo shop boss, oddly . . . wishing for her approval and feeling a couple of words expressed to her by this boss as if they were her 'graduation'. Weird.

I did not like the story, though I normally like the work I've read by this author.

Rating: 3.10

December 6 2017

Red Suits and Second Chances by Eve Frances
Office Party; Transgender: MtF; Toronto; Canada

An office has a Christmas party. Gina finds a coworker, Felicia, attractive but doesn't know if she should do anything with this thought. Gina is made aware of Felicia's thoughts. The end.

Rating: 3

December 6 2017

A Gift of Words by Patricia Penn
Boston, Demons

Something called the 'Fianna' defend humans against rival demons. Yet another story involving two women who find it 'wrong, but feels so good' to be with another woman 'that way'. bah. I looking for nice holiday stories, not guilt-tripping women tentatively pawing at each other, while knowing it's 'wrong'.

The two female demons stumble upon a Christmas fair in Boston while attempting to locate rival demons. While doing so, one becomes bedazzled by the decorations, while the other becomes shocked by watching two women publically kissing each other.

I believe the story might take some time around 1993? Well, I think some part of it is, and some other part is set in 1996.

I've no idea if this story is some kind of stand-alone, or if there is some series connected to it. It is quite . . . good though.

Rating: 4.94

December 6 2017

Snow, With a Chance of Love by B.A. Caldwell
Librarian, dog, snow-storm, Portland, Graduate Student, Humor

The story opens with a woman gazing about her torn up apartment. Her own apartment. That she herself tore up. Because she was looking for a missing library book. She starts putting stuff back together, sad that she can't find the book. Her dog wakes up and wanders over. She begins petting the dog then glances over to his bed. And spots the book in that bed. All chewed up.

There's a snow storm about to hit and the main character (it's easier to remember people's names and stuff if I don't read about 20 short stories in a row before being able to do reviews, mmphs) wants to get some entertainment from the library. Otherwise she'd put it off.

There's a good bit of humor here. And great chemistry between 'Dream Librarian' and the main character. Fun story.

Rating: 4.80

December 6 2017

Crossroads by Ruth F. Simon
Religion, Christianity, Family, stuff, Nurse, Accountant?

At the advanced age of 29 the main character in this story has come out to her family during Thanksgiving meal. At the part where everyone was supposed to go around saying what they were thankful for. Whereupon her father very aggressively lectured her and told her to leave and never return until she has repented her ways. Her father, by the way, is a Pastor.

Lots of conservative religious people in this collection.

Right, so, that was prior to the start of this story - that revelation and banishment. Now father has cancer and the main character is the only one capable of taking the time to try to help. And she tries to do so.

Meanwhile, because hey why not, that main character struck up a friendship with one of the nurses in the hospital, and there may or may not be more there (it's hinted at).

Rating: 3.33

December 6 2017

More than a Holiday Romance by Chris Zett
30s; Advent Calendar; Doctor; Professor

For 12 years two women traveled together during the summer as travel friends and fuck buddies. At least from end of college to before last summer. When one of the two had wanted to have an important discussion and the other cancelled at the last minute.

Now the one who cancelled has been sending postcards from their trips as a kind of Advent calendar kind of thing. And the other isn't sure how to handle things.

Interesting story.

Rating: 4.35

December 6 2017

We Wish You A Merry Christmas by Lyn Thorne-Adler
Fantasy; Christmastime; Elves?

I've literally no clue how to rate this story. It just . . what the . . . what did I just read?

Rating: WTF?

December 6 2017

Sadie and Rosa by Alison Solomon
Hanukkah, 70s, Family

Two old Jewish women fight over coming out to their family.

While it is nice to see another religion in the mix, the story itself was just average.

Rating: 3.20

December 7 2017

Kicker's Christmas by Lois Cloarec Hart
1917, Canada

This and the next story in the collection would probably have been better read after reading the book/series associated with them. I'm sure both could have been 'neat' and or 'interesting' additions - additions to the story. But both were crowded with people - one even had an odd little brief POV jump to one of the side characters for like 2 seconds that I'm sure is better understood by those who have read the series - and both had story lines that add to the original series/books instead of being stories all by themselves (for the most part, both could be read by themselves, both, though, seem tightly tied to previous works that I've not read).

This specific story here involved Kicker and . . . um, I think it's Maddie preparing dinner, learning of Clarence being hasseled for not being in the war (which pisses off Pudge), though he's not off fighting because of a heart condition not because he is a coward; Seamus arrives, mentions there's a guy at the train station, the women wander off to get him, etc. etc. Oh, and Kicker and Maddie think of their life together.

If you enjoyed this short story, you might want to read Lois Cloarec Hart's Kicker's Journey, the novel in which Kicker and Madelyn met and fell in love.

Rating: 3.43

Just a Normal Christmas by Caren J. Werlinger
Christmas; Big party, Cats

As noted above, this story is also a continuation of a series/book.

The story opens with Jules and Kelli arriving back at their home after a longish journey - they'd spent Thanksgiving with Mae, Brooke (don't recall if it actually is Brooke or not) and Ronnie. Jules has invited that gang to pop over for Christmas. And, before the story is over, many more pop over, including Kelli's dad, sister, coworker Toni, and friend Donna. Toni being the super clumsy klutz, while Donna's the one who briefly gets a turn at the POV controls (and recently finalized her separation with . . . whoever she broke up with, Elaine or something like that).

Interesting good story. Best part were Holly and Mistletoe. The cats.

If you enjoyed this short story, you might want to read Caren Werlinger's Turning for Home, the novel which introduced Jules, Kelli, and their family and friends.

Rating: 3.75

December 7 2017

Chatting with Charlie by Catherine Lane
Gym Teacher

A gym teacher reflects on her life and is super depressed until a former student gives a speech.

Rating: 3.12

December 7 2017

OVERALL
S. Claus by Blythe Rippon: 4.88
This Thing by Jove Belle: 3.10
Red Suits and Second Chances by Eve Frances: 3.00
A Gift of Words by Patricia Penn: 4.94
Snow, With a Chance of Love by B.A. Caldwell: 4.8
Crossroads by Ruth F. Simon: 3.33
More than a Holiday Romance by Chris Zett: 4.35
We Wish You A Merry Christmas by Lyn Thorne-Adler: WTF?
Sadie and Rosa by Alison Solomon: 3.2
Kicker's Christmas by Lois Cloarec Hart: 3.43
Just a Normal Christmas by Caren J. Werlinger: 3.75
Chatting with Charlie by Catherine Lane: 3.12
Overall: 3.8072727272727272727272727272727

So, top three reads: 1) A Gift of Words by Patricia Penn: 4.94; 2) S. Claus by Blythe Rippon: 4.88 & 3) Snow, With a Chance of Love by B.A. Caldwell: 4.80

Sadly, in terms of finding new authors to read, I've already read all but one of Rippon's books, Penn has just one more short story in a different collection for me to read, and Caldwell, apparently, has nothing at all else I could read. mmphs.

December 7 2017



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Carolyn for Christmas by Lucy Carey

Carolyn for Christmas by Lucy Carey

My rating: 3 of 5 stars


Neat to be in Ireland and to see Irish lesbians. Less neat to see a homophobic horrible family. And the reason behind the long time rivalry was kind of stupid (though, sadly, understandable - stupid, but understandable - the part the two women involved played).

Rating: 3.33



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It Had to be You by Clare Lydon

It Had To Be You by Clare Lydon

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


Milly and Georgia are a couple (who had meet a month before the story. In a bar).

Jane is Milly's mother and, shockingly, the same age as Georgia (or should I have worded that the other way around, shockingly Georgia is the same age as Jane, her girlfriend's mother). Rachel is Jane's friend.

Milly has invited her girlfriend to her mother's Christmas gathering. Georgia is, naturally, unsettled by the idea but is, as she says in her own words, pussy-whipped by Milly. She figures, Georgia that is, that Milly's mother will see her as a cradle robber from hell (or however that was worded), since - as I've mentioned several times - Georgia is the same age as Jane (actually it was the part wherein Georgia was much older than Milly; it just happened that Georgia's age and Jane's age corresponded in the way it did).

Prior to the party Milly has 'laid the groundwork' so that her mother 'knows' that Milly is going with someone older than herself. Jane is under the impression, though, that this means Georgia would be around 35 (ten years older than Milly's 23 or 25 (note: mother Jane and Rachel had talked, they guessed Milly's girlfriend is/was ten years older, and so 35; when Georgia is on the way to Jane's house, Georgia thinks of Milly as being 23 - I am confused by this 23/25 age thingie). When, in reality, she's closer to 65 (heh, Jane is actually 54, and Georgia is also 54 as well; of note: Jane's friend Rachel mentions that Jane could go with a 35 year old, which horrify's Jane who responds with 'I'm 54 in case you'd forgotten', so obviously she's going to be super happy her 23 year old daughter is going with someone who is 54. heh).

Also present at this party will be 'Joanna and her partner' (boyfriend). Joanna is a daughter of Jane's.

Not present at the party will be Paul, Jane's dead husband, who died 3 years ago.

Story from more than one point of view, and includes Jane (the mother of Milly), and Georgia.

One issue rears it's head immediately, though it was one I didn't expect (though maybe I should have). Has something to do . . . well, I can't even say that much. 'With something'. hehe. Even a hint would be too spoiler-y. Though I'm not sure I can say much more about this story since this is kind of a 'game-changer' kind of thing. I mean, it's one thing if your daughter dates someone your own age. It's something else entirely if, well, again, I can't say. (view spoiler)[I put myself into a trap there, I could have just said, and I only thought of it after the fact, 'another thing entirely if you, as in Jane, previously knew the woman before she became your daughter's girlfriend.'(view spoiler)[There's more to that story (hide spoiler)] (hide spoiler)]

Hmm. There's a shelf I wish to put this story on, but can't. Because - spoiler-y. Hmms.

A solid story - deeper and with more impact than I expected. Has some humor. Some angst/drama.

November 27 2016



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Mistletoe by Lyn Gardner

Mistletoe by Lyn Gardner

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


This is another of those occasions when, late at night, I decided to see what I'd read the next day. And accidentally read an entire story. Namely this one here.

When Diana was four she 'wrote' a letter to Santa via her aunt. She asked for a soul-mate, she wanted what her parents (now dead) had had. Naturally . . . . well 1) Santa's real and he grants children's wishes (just 1 per child if I read right), though only those wishes of children, not adults; 2) it's 30 years after Diana had written that letter, and that wish has still not been granted (it got lost in the lining of a bag), though now that Santa and company know about this wish, they decide to try to do something about it.

Santa and 'Him' come to an agreement, since Santa isn't really supposed to be helping/granting wishes of adults. Santa has learned that Diana will be, or is supposed to be attending three Christmas parties, and so Santa is going to send an elf with magical mistletoe to be used at each party. The mistletoe will give a nudge, not create something that isn't there.

Diana is an unemployed former prison officer (she had been a prison teacher, but that position got removed so she moved over to prison officer, but learned she didn't really like being a guard). She is going to these three parties because her friend, who I believe is named Gloria, needs to go to these parties - is required to go to them. They are three company parties for the three different divisions at the law-firm she works at.

Division 1 and party one is lead by an asshole of a man, and let me stress that again - he is a really huge asshole. His division handles criminal matters, so his party, filled as it is by clients, is filled with 'criminals' and their barely clothed, surgically altered, and probably ex-prostitute 'girlfriends'. Also present at the party are the law firm employees, including the heads of the other two divisions, and that ‘plus one’ – Diana.

Diana enters and is immediately annoyed that she agreed to go. Based on seeing the party guests and being sexually molested by Thad Falgen’s eyeballs (I don’t actually remember the asshole’s name, but ‘Thad Falgen’ works for me). Thad is quite taken with Diana and begins to make some moves. Showing that it is clearly power and money that would cause him to ever get laid. Diana’s not interested, and not because she’s a lesbian (as far as she knows, she’s straight – yeah, I’d forgotten this was that type of story).

Recall, if you will, that there’s this elf that is supposed to be flinging mistletoes at people (okay, hanging one up). Well he arrives and is very tiny, invisible, and partakes of the food and drink. While waiting for his moment. For some odd reason he thinks that Diana’s ‘soul mate’ might be ‘Thad’ so he sets things up. Thad, super drunk, won’t let Diana leave when she wants to do so, so Diana is saved by one of the other law firm division heads – Jamison – the individual who Diana had actually spent some interesting time with talking to at the party. Saves with a kiss in a ‘now she’s been kissed, get out of the way’ way.

Jamison meant for a three second thing, at most, but there ended up being more than 3 seconds. And Jamison doesn’t know how Diana felt about the issue, because Diana immediately left after the kiss.

Division 2 and party 2 are hosted by ‘Lillian Willbourgh’ (again, I’m not actually sure about the name). ‘Lillian’ handles divorces, and only ever takes the side of the men. Also she is a very huge and very forceful bigot and homophobic individual. She also really really loves Christmas decorations and her party looks look . . . well, . hmm. Like 18 Christmas stores were raided for all products, and dumped inside her place. Also there’s like 800 tons of potpourri stinking up the place. Which causes massive issues to Jamison, but both Jamison and Diana had been looking forward to seeing each other again, so Jamison stuck it out.

And so. Two people circling each other. Spending but moments together. And one having to deal with the idea that they might actually be a lesbian, despite not previously realizing that possibility, and both dealing with massive waves of lust/love for the other based on like 4 minutes of being near each other.

Massaging the ending, and cutting most of the epilogue would make this a great perfect story. The epilogue was way too heavy-handed and sappy, though. (view spoiler)[firstly – party three ended with the two woman fucking; epilogue opens moments later to find . . . much time has passed, but the first scene has them fucking again; secondly – there was way too much sappy speechifying about just how totally awesome, the best people ever, going on about Diana and Jamison. Thirdly, what-the-fuck? (view spoiler)[Naming your son Jamison? That’s . . .. Sure, Jamison, the woman/mother, goes by Jamie most of the time, but still. (hide spoiler)] (hide spoiler)]

Second time I’ve read this story.

Rating: 4.65

December 19 2016



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Twas the Nightmare Before Christmas: A Diz and Clarissa Story by Ann McMan

Twas the Nightmare Before Christmas: A Diz and Clarissa Story by Ann McMan

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


The fourth in this series of short stories involving Diz and Clarisaa, and the only only not in that 'Tales of Diz and Clarissa' otherwise known as Three.

As expected, the story takes place in Baltimore right around Christmas and the Rachel Maddow look alike Diz has gotten herself in trouble yet again. Because Marty, her friend, has gotten himself very ill and so Diz has to watch his three kids and super large dog. Which also includes a trip to the mall to see Santa on Christmas Eve. Which shouldn't take more than, say, 4 hours.

- Diz or Rachel Maddow?

The 'Clarissa is always pissed at Diz and her accidental troubles' continued. Though with a hint of amusement on Clarissa's part. Plus Clarissa actually got 'into the action' this time (and was the cause for some of Diz's troubles).

Good enough continuation of the series.

November 20 2016



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Three by Ann McMann

Three by Ann McMan

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


Contains three of the four Diz and Clarissa short stories.

Nevermore
Two coworkers work in the same basement area. One is named Diz, the other Clarissa. One's destined to not rise much above her current position, the other is headed to the moon (or something like that). One looks like Rachel Maddow while the other has red hair . . . and is gorgeous.

They bicker a lot.

One, the rich one, Clarissa, invites the other, Diz, to spend time with her at the Christmas party - since Dash, the boyfriend of Clarissa, will be late. And so they do - spend time together there. Diz getting steadily drunker, Clarissa nursing 1 glass of wine.

Lovely little short story. Abrupt ending.

Rating: 4.25

November 17 2016

A Christmas Tree Grows in Baltimore
It's a year later and Clarissa, as the first story promised, is rapidly moving up the company ladder, while Diz is still in her old position. Though with a new office mate.

Most of this story does not take place with both Clarissa and Diz in it.

This one had humor and it made me tear up (and, just like the first story, there was vomiting).

Rating: 4.62

November 17 2016

Blended Families
Family, Holiday, Christmas

This is the story that I probably shouldn't have read immediately. There's only so much 'one partner blaming (largely incorrectly) the other for every mistake known to man; while the other partner just takes it like a doormat that feels lucky' before I explode. So I ended up pausing this specific story before continuing.

Once I continued it the story turned out okay - good even.

The two main characters are once again about to enjoy Christmas (every story, including the fourth not in this collection, are set during Christmas time in Baltimore). The difference this time is that both live together, and they are going to have a 'blended families' Christmas party - both of their families. The ultra-rich, and the less than ultra-rich. Diz, naturally, is ashamed of her family (for whatever reason - a lot of her problems are built on her feeling ashamed of herself or of her family).

As normal - stuff occurs out of Diz's control that end up involving the police, damage, and her partner - Clarissa, being ultra pissed at her (while also fighting back laughter).

Rating: 3.9

November 19 2016

Overall
Nevermore: 4.25
A Christmas Tree Grows in Baltimore: 4.62
Blended Families: 3.9

Overall: 4.257

November 20 2016



View all my reviews

Gingerbread Hearts edited by Judy Underwood

Gingerbread Hearts
edited by Judy Underwood
Pages: 108
Date: November 2012
Publisher: Ylva Publishing
Series: None

Review
Rating: Overall: 4.025
Read: November 3 to 4 2016

Holiday Outing by Alison Grey
Coming Out, Family, Slice of Life, no romance

A woman of 25 has known for a while that she's a lesbian, has even had two girlfriends by this point, but has yet to come out to her family. Her sister talks her into doing so.

Certain amount of humor. Certain amount of . . . timing.

Rating: 3.5

November 3 2016

It’s in the Pudding by Emma Weimann
Family, Dentist, 'Romance'

A woman hasn't had a relationship in 2 years. She thinks she might want one now. It's Christmas time and it's traditional that the person who finds the almond in the almond pudding can make a wish and 'it will come true'. So, the woman wants that almond. There's this wish she's going to make (involving finding someone for herself). She finds the almond. And breaks her tooth on the almond. And so has to go to the dentist on Christmas day (or is it the day before? I forget now).

Rating: 4.12

November 3 2016

Devgo by Corinna Behrens
Dog, Scrooge, bisexual, no romance

Businesswoman tosses and turns in her bed Christmas Eve. Bells ring that it's midnight. Brightness fills room. Businesswoman blinks. Looks over, sees mini devil on her window sill. *reader thinks to self: ah yes, so this is a Scrooge story*

hehe. Woman barks questions at the tiny devil. Devil just blink at her lazily. Woman becomes annoyed by the non-response. heh.

Ah, the title of the story corresponds to the mini-devil's name (*reader in thought: new thought, not scrooge retelling*).

This is confusing. The woman is acting like it's just normal to have a tiny devil appear. And to yell at it. Then be confused when it doesn't make an appointment instead of just show up. Yes, confused is right word. Confusing.

Okay, so - Devgo works for both God and the Devil when they don't know where to send someone. Of everything I read so far, that's the most confusing part. No, not what you might think - the part where they wouldn't know where to send this specific person. Everything points towards a specific direction. Nothing seems to point the other way. So, what's the confusion for God and the devil? hmms. oooh! heh. Of course. Shesh, I should stop with rambling during stories. Of course, when I do that, my reviews end up being like two words long. Which is probably better, but still. Right, so here the 'confusion' is the part wherein neither God nor the Devil want this woman to be joining them. Ah. heh. Another theme I've heard before.

And . . . the reoccurring problem with this collection of stories continues. These stories are just way too short. They are just snippets for the most part. Not full short stories. Ah well.

Rating: 3.43

November 3 2016

A Magical Christmas by RJ Nolan
Family, kids, multiple parents, bisexual, dog, romance, Annoying ex(es)

A woman with kids learns that her ex-husband has, once again, bailed on taking the kids for a weekend. And so her plans with her lover have been ruined.

Story from the point of view of both Kris, and Erin (Erin being the 'a woman' above).

It's funny, in its way, but the fact that every story before this one in the collection had nothing even approaching 'erotica' makes the bits here annoying. This is the fourth story and now people are going to start fondling each other and stuff? mmphs. Yeah, I'm actually kind of annoyed. I know I already said that but . . . something.

heh. So, a departure from the earlier stories - a bit of eroticism (very very tiny bit, more visible due to the complete lack in the earlier stories than for any other reason), and a fuller story than the others. Less of 'just a snippet'.

Rating: 3.7

The Christmas Grump by Jae
Security guard - mall, kid

Hmm. Story starting out with a vague feeling of 'I've been here before' (story-wise).

And . . . yes, I've read this before. At least I think I have. Darn. This is at least the second time I've excitedly started in on a Jae story . . . only to realize that I'd already read it - last time it was, I think 'Morning After' which I had read when I read the book 'Depature from the Script' (if I have the titles right). Here the title of the story is the same. Just two different short story collections. This one and 'Love Beneath the Christmas Tree.' And looking at that collection - the next Jae story is also in that collection. So, it's as if there are no Jae stories in this collection - no new ones. I feel annoyed by that fact. I'd be even more annoyed if I hadn't gotten this collection here for free (just like I had gotten that 'Morning After' short story for free as well).

Well, guess I'll have a reread or two then. I mean, it has been 2 years since I read that other collection.

So, since I didn't write anything for that other collection -

This story stars Rachel, a security guard at a mall at Christmas time. She's grumpy because of all the arrests she's been having to make. While she's running around attending to 'incidents' she keeps spotting a specific boy all by himself in a toy store in the exact same spot, day after day. Near lego toys. Starring at them. If this was a story in one of the other collections I read recently, I'd know instantly what was going on (that or if I hadn't read this before) - ghost! But no, this is a Christmas collection, not one of my Halloween collections.

mmphs. How annoying. Apparently I got something in both of my eyes at the same time. They are both wet and stuff. No idea how that could have happened.

Rating: 4.8

Kissing Ms. Santa Claus by Jae
Family, kid

Ah, now I know why both stories are in both collections (as opposed to just one) - the two stories are connected. Rachel and Lilian (who I didn't even mention - mother of that boy who was looking at legos - Tyler) reappear in this story here. A year after the earlier story. And Christmas again.

Rating: 4.6

Overall
Holiday Outing by Alison Grey - 3.5
It’s in the Pudding by Emma Weimann - 4.12
Devgo by Corinna Behrens - 3.43
A Magical Christmas by RJ Nolan - 3.7
The Christmas Grump by Jae - 4.8
Kissing Ms. Santa Claus by Jae - 4.6

Total overall rating: 4.025

Wicked Things edited by Jae and Astrid Ohletz

Wicked Things
edited by Jae and Astrid Ohletz
Pages: 388
Date: October 23 2014
Publisher: Ylva Publishing
Series: None

Review
Rating: Overall: 3.3357
Read: October 28 to November 3 2016

Another set of short stories from Ylva with a Halloween theme.

Spiritquest, LLC by Andi Marquette
Denver, Ghost (from 1920s), Ghost hunters

Ghost hunters investigate the Halstead House in Denver - sightings had been made of a young woman named Lily who had died in the 1920s at the age of 26. The Ghost hunters include Allie, Mike, Mandy, and Sky (a newcomer). The story is from the point of view of Allie. A joke is made that they should rename themselves 'Spiritqueer' since all of them are queer.

This is a very interesting story, quite detailed, quite thrilling/exciting. I wasn't sure if this was going to be a romance or an erotica or what, so I was kind of hunting in the beginning for who the potential pairing might be. If you, the reader of this review, wish to know beforehand - look behind the spoiler - think of it as either 'no one' or 'the ghost' - since there is a century long romance there..

I loved this story - I loved the atmosphere, the relatively gentle nature of everything - considering the the subject matter; the romance angle, everything. Which is somewhat surprising to me because of the author. See - I failed myself a long time ago. I had this rule that I was never going to allow 1 story to dictate whether or not I like or hate an author (or, more exactly, whether I try anything else by them). And I failed myself.

For you see, I had read something by Andi Marquette before. A book that was, in general, liked by readers (4.01 overall rating), and strongly liked by friends (4.05 overall rating). While I myself had seen it as kind of meh, and was something I was only able to give, tentatively, a 3 rating to. So I never again attempted a story by Marquette. I'd see things that might interest me, notice the author, and cringe away. It's actually the combo of me giving a 3 rating, and the part where I was in the minority for that rating. But there was this story here in this collection, see, so . . . I read it. And loved it. This is why I have this rule to not base decisions (good or bad) on one work.

Rating: 5.0

October 29 2016

A Certain Moon by Elaine Burnes
Writer, Artist (Illustrator), Writing convention/conference; small town; shifters

Two women meet at a writing conference. One is a writer, the other is an illustrator. Oddly, they learn that both live in the same small town. They become friends, and then after a long while, become more. One night - the night told in this story, one invites the other back to her place. It's Halloween, so each ring of the bell causes everyone in the cottage (the dog, cat and hamster, and the woman) to spring forward.

Well, this didn't go the direction I excepted. And I felt as if the story ended one paragraph too soon. We, the reader (and the people in the story) learn of one of their secrets but the other remained hidden. And since I got/guess their secret wrong, I can't just assume my guess for the other one if correct, so . . . annoying.

And no, I'm not going to put my wrong guess, my undiscovered guess, nor the correct 'solution' to this paranormal short story, for that is something to be revealed slowly over the course of the story, not to be told in a review. Well, the solution, not my guess. Though I'm sure some might come to similar conclusions.

Rating: 3.8

November 2 2016

Walking After Midnight by Lois Cloarec Hart
Halloween party, Vampire

A wallflower type woman around 28 (I believe) named Gem St. Claire is talked into going to a holiday party. She wants nothing to do with it but can't get out of it. It's like the day before so she has to make do with whatever she can make herself so she ends up in a tux an cape and pretends to be a vampire.

Part of the 'talking into going' is the part where Kate, someone Gem has lusted after since high school, will be there. And is, apparently, single. The friend of Gem's tells her that she needs to ask her out already (with positive or negative results to the asking out) or move on from her lust for Kate. She's basically put her life on hold because of these feelings. At least her romantic life.

Things go about as expected (don't ask what I mean, that would be spoiler-y, there's like a ton of directions 'expected' could have gone) and Gem finds herself wandering a graveyard on the way home - darting from the party early. Runs into a woman in that graveyard. A woman dressed somewhat similarly to Gem (tux, cumberbund, cape). A woman named Cleo.

Some advice given. The night continues. A reunion of sorts occur. More time passes. Another Halloween roles around. Life, such as it is, continues.

I'm being purposely vague. Lovely story.

Rating: 5.0

November 2 2016

Moon Dance by Bridget Essex
Camping, Werewolf, Shifter

Essex sure is obsessed with wolves.

So, a couple are perfect for each other - they've been together for awhile. One night, around Halloween, one of the pair darts off on a run through the woods (they had been camping). When she finally gets back, she's flustered, and immediately backs up. Forces a return trip home, packs up there was well, severs all contacts, and disappears.

It's a year later, and the other member of that coupling (former coupling), is at that same park again. For more camping (by the way - I'm fairly certain the word 'camping' was used several times - yet the campers apparently 'camp' inside of cabins. Confusing).

The woman, naturally, is sad. Stuff happens (including graphic sex - between two women). The end.

Not the best wolf story I've read by Essex.

Rating: 3.6

October 28 2016

The Road Home by May Dawney
Halloween, bar, student, small town, bad weather, ghost story, age-20s

Have you ever seen that Steven Spielberg directed 'Duel' tv film (well it was intended for tv, I think, might have gotten a theater release)? This story is nothing like that (I should do this with all my reviews (you know the 'Hobbit'? this is nothing like that - hehe). At least in the sense that the weather was down right nice in that film. And the 'events' that unfolded were much longer than the events that unfolded here. In the sense of two cars chasing each other in a life and death like struggle? Yeah, similar. Though it's pouring rain in this story, and not everyone involved in the struggle might realize . . . things.

Depending on whether or not someone has to be 21 to serve alcohol, this story involves two young women around the age of 20 or 21 who end up near each other in an unexpected way. Which leads to a pulse-pounding encounter. Actually, more than one encounter.

Quite thrilling. Exciting. Good story.

Rating: 4.95

November 2 2016

Hit and Run by Q. Kelly
Age-40s, single mother, kid, two straight women, Mental illness

Abused woman wants to thank the hero/heroine who saved her from abusive husband. Five years ago. She thinks about this constantly. Figures it'll never happen now. It has been 5 years after all. Though she knows she'd recognize them if they bumped into each other. Because they are bonded. Or something. That's Maxie's point of view.

There's also a Penny's point of view as well. Penny, it would appear, was in a plane crash when she was 7. 150 people on board, including her parents. Number of survivors? One. And Penny isn't a ghost. Apparently this is still on her mind, constantly, many years later - I assume since that's what the focus is on when we turn to Penny's POV. Penny did not survive unscratched - no, bone fractures, shattered, etc. Penny has a six year old son. And is 40. She had a fling with a man. So - both of the main characters are straight? hmms.

Penny is very sad that she killed that man. Five years ago.

This is a super depressing story. I want out. Please help free me from this story. This story has the level of story detail and telling that I'd expect if Detective Sergeant Joe Friday were telling me this story. Just the facts, Joe. Just the facts. I'm soo bored. Pleeease help me! I'm trapped in a story! Noooooo.... soooooo bored.

Ah - that made me sit up - 'I got to know the back roads of Northern Virginia pretty well.' - I used to drive the back roads of Northern Virginia. Hilly, curvy, random dips, random rises, thin roads. Deep ravines. I know those roads (or I knew them - most of that is gone now, smoothed out, replaced by those 'super expressways'; but they used to be that way).

Okay, seriously? Really? Late at night (one, what is she doing driving around late at night? No explanation?), barely awake, swerving around, thunk, stop on the side of the road (and I know the sides of those roads - there were no sides - just deep drops, so really, she stopped in the road). She gets out. She looks around. Nothing. She gets in car. Leaves. And she feels super guilty about this . . . why? mmph.

Soo bored.

Heh. Both of these straight women seem overly lusty towards the dead man's sister. heh.

That was the most disgusting thing I've ever witnessed in a story. Just disgusting. EWWWW!!! - So, Maxie and Alice eat a meal together at a restaurant. Alice being that dead man's sister. Maxi's fork is messed up. She waves it at a waiter. Gets a clean fork. Alice reaches over, steals the fork, and drops it on the floor. Then pulls her own fork out from her food, licks it, then hands it to Maxi 'use this' (presumably Alice will now eat her spaghetti with her fingers). How incredibly gross. SOOO GROSS!!!! Also, eww - Maxie is turned on by this act. Eww.

Good god this is a disgustingly gross story. Maxie kept the fork. And now she's describing how she is in a hotel with Alice, not the disgusting part, no that would be the part wherein she's taking the time to describe the fact that she's in the bathroom. On the toilet. Trying to force a drop of urine out. Um, why the fuck am I being told this? WHYYYYYY!!!!! (I appear to have become brain damaged at some point, obviously, what with all the caps and screaming).

Rating: negative a trillion stars

November 2 2016

A Lesson in Magic by Cori Kane
Witch, Halloween Party, Lesbian attracted to man

The tags above are basically enough.

Rating: 2.7

November 2 2016

Strega by R.G. Emanuelle
Witch

A woman runs away from her husband. Who she never wanted. Who had 'taken everything' from her family, then dragged her off as well. She runs across 'devil worshippers' and is very frightened.

I'm confused by the comments on witches in the last story and in this one. Last story had the man in it make some comment like 'oh, how politically correct' (not that term, but similar - conveying that the woman who made a vaguely 'oh, witch, that's okay' comment was just being . . . PC.

And then in this one where the woman is deathly afraid of the witch. I just don't get it. Seriously, I don't. What's up with that? I think I've read way too many things, contemporary and fantasy, for me to a) immediately scream in horror if someone uses the 'w' word; b) understand the concept of someone - today, in modern times, being all 'eww, witch'. *shrugs* I've been corrupted, obviously.

Rating: 2

November 2 2016

Object Permanence by Steph Gottschalk
Ghost story

A sad story. From the POV of a ghost. Watching the world as it moves, as time passes. Sad.

Rating: 4.25

November 2 2016

Taylor-Made by Catherine Lane
Magic, Vanity, Hollywood, Paralegal, Changing Fortunes

Incredibly vain story.

Paralegal with 'body issues' spots a jacket. Steals it. Wears it. Is magical jacket. She becomes thin and beautiful. Adds a trophy girlfriend (well, she's powerful in her own right, but I never got the sense the main character cared about her beyond her looks). Everyone of any importance is gorgeous (or male).

Not sure I particularly like the message here.

Especially since 'everybody' knows that true power - true 'showing' of power is to have people respect and be charmed by you, to want to be near you and rub against you, to believe you hold great wisdom and power . . . while looking like a toad. Or something like that.

Rating: 2.75

November 2 2016

Ghost Lights by Erzbet Bishop
Ghost stkry, River of Moistness

Another 'dragged to a ghost tour story because friend wanted specific at on the tour' story. Another 'person leaves tour, goes down tbe moistness river' story. Less interesting/satisfying than the other story like this. The other was a romance. This is just fucking.

Rating: 3.3

November 3 2016

A Winter Story by S.M. Harding
Ghost/grief story.

half Scottish/ half Ute. Woman went to NY. Found art success and a woman. Lost woman to drugs and art success. Then that other woman died. MC goes back to New Mexico. Tries to contact her dead lover.

interacts with a raven.

Gets super depressing story shoved into her on too of her own.

Interacts with a raven.

Contemplates killing herself.

Rating: 3.3

November 3 2016

That Day by Orhea the Dreamer
Werewolves, Texas

Old fashioned version of werewolves. Hmm, that's misleading. A story set in Texas that uses the older version of werewolves. The kind that morphs into a beast - half human, half monster. As opposed to the more modern version of werewolves that involves humans transforming into full blown wolves - or at least creatures that walk on all fours, are furry, and look like extra large wolves.

Interesting to see this other version of werewolves. Story was kind of irritatingly told though - in a 'my name is, or was . . .' way. Entire story is a flash back story. And written that way.

And I rather disliked the dynamic between the two women in the story. The one who uses and abuses the other, and forces a collar onto her. And the other, the main character, who loves her abuser. mmphs.

Rating: 2.75

November 3 2016

Fresh Blood by Eve Francis
Chicago, Police, nurse, Vampire, Suspense, Crime

hmm. Okay. So a police officer is out on night shift, with her partner. They are staking out a store that may or may not be robbed. Then two people roar up on motorcycles, shots are fired, people are injured, killed. Sucked on.

Oh, did I not mention that yet? The female officer is a vampire. And while she had made a promise to her girlfriend, Violet, fresh blood is fresh blood. And so. hmms.

This is interesting in a way. Really shows that vampires (at least in this story universe) aren't just people wearing plastic fangs but basically human. No, separate from humans. Different. Like someone who likes x, makes a promise to not consume x, but can't stop themselves from doing so because x (let's make x = 'beef') isn't really anything that they internally have an issue with consuming. But their human partner does (here change human to vegetarian). And so - the conflict that arises because the meat eater (vampire) consumed meat (fresh blood).

Interspecies relationship between Violet the human and Allie a vampire.

And then the vampire and human mated. And because I'd had all these reminders that these are in fact different creatures, different species . . . it was like reading about a monkey humping a human. And so . . . ewww. Thanks for making vampires and humans seem so different and then have them hump. This is . . . disturbing. Not hot. Not hot at all. At all. I might be ill.

Rating: 3.3*
*I'm sure I'd have rated this higher if this didn't end up reading like bestiality. And I became ill.

November 1 2016

Overall
Spiritquest, LLC by Andi Marquette - 5.0
A Certain Moon by Elaine Burnes - 3.8
Walking After Midnight by Lois Cloarec Hart - 5.0
Moon Dance by Bridget Essex - 3.6
The Road Home by May Dawney - 4.95
Hit and Run by Q. Kelly - negative a trillion stars
A Lesson in Magic by Cori Kane - 2.7
Strega by R.G. Emanuelle - 2
Object Permanence by Steph Gottschalk - 4.25
Taylor-Made by Catherine Lane - 2.75
Ghost Lights by Erzbet Bishop - 3.3
A Winter Story by S.M. Harding - 3.3
That Day by Orhea the Dreamer - 2.75
Fresh Blood by Eve Francis - 3.3

Overall Rating: 3.3357

Ticket 1207 by Robin Alexander

Ticket 1207
by Robin Alexander
Pages: 84
Date: December 23 2014
Publisher: Intalgio Publications
Series: None

Review
Rating: 4.75
Read: October 24 2016

There are certain things that come with an Alexander book, not always, but a lot of the time.

1) Quirky characters that border on being super irritating/great characters;
2) A story that takes place in Louisiana (I believe all but one that I have read took place in Louisiana, and that other one took place in Mississippi – ‘Gift of Time’ (though a few include other places in addition to time in Louisiana, like ‘Dear Me’ has some time in Florida, and ‘Just Jorie’ has a brief moment or two in New York));
3) Wacky older people – mostly grandmas (not always);
4) Wacky side characters (not always);
5) Humor;
6) The main characters tend to be older than somewhat the norm with Lesbian Romances, tending to be in their 30s or 40s;
7) For a while there I thought vomiting was one – but then I found out that it was just the luck of the draw – the first books I had read by Alexander all had that in there (like ‘Just Jorie’, but that it isn’t actually a trait common with Alexander books I was happy to eventually find out).

Here we have quirky characters, a story that takes place in Louisiana (New Orleans), wacky side characters (Theo); humor; no vomiting (that I recall).

Shawn Masterson is two things – super good looking (of which she is somewhat aware), and super shy. So shy that the book opens after about a year of Shawn dropping by a specific jewelry store. Giving up various items to be repaired (which include breaking them first so that she could drop them off). Because she fancies one of the women in there – Jill Searcy (the other main character and other POV), but cannot get up the nerve to ask her out. Shawn is a botanist. (just as I add in someone else in Jill’s paragraph, I’m back to add in Shawn’s best friend – straight Vera (at least I believe I recall that being her name – trouble with being 55% into the next book before I write anything down for the book I’d already completed).

Jill Searcy is also two things – competent and good at her job, and lonely – after getting her heart twisted and torn up. Jill owns and runs a jewelry store with her cousin Rene. Rene is the acknowledged ‘better’ version – acknowledged at least by her own family (by her I mean both Rene and Jill’s families). Just all around better. To the point that they blamed Jill when Rene came out as lesbian around the same time Jill did. (Not because of any kind of kissing cousins thing, but because they ‘expect’ certain things, and tom-boy Jill is expected to be lesbian (well, less expected to be lesbian than expected to be the one if one of the two became one), Rene – whose two hobbies growing up were playing dress up and playing with make-up, was expected to be straight – so they blamed Jill when Rene turned out to not be straight).

Theo Brasseaux is the owner of Theo Brasseaux’s Shop of Voodoo. And I’ll note immediately – no, she’s not either the third person in a three way relationship, or a third angle on a love triangle. She’s just the owner of the shop across the street. Who has a major impact on the story (depending). Theo’s the wacky side character. She is also the one that I, as seems somewhat common with Alexander books, rather disliked in the beginning, before having her grow on me. Somewhat. By the end of the book I was up to the level of ‘meh, I’m okay with her existing’.

Right, so, story – both Shawn and Jill fancy each other but Shawn’s super shy and, apparently, Jill isn’t the type to ask someone out – at least not when they look super hot like Shawn (she has some confidence issues of her own, what with growing up being compared, and being found the lesser, with Rene). Theo gets into the mix because a) right when Shawn finally got up the nerve to ask Jill out, Theo storms into Jill’s store and demands immediate work done by Jill on something Theo has that is broken; b) Theo offers, separately, advice and ‘help’ to jump start ‘something’ between Shawn and Jill.

It’s a great little mini-story, set during the holidays. Great Christmas-in-New-Orleans vibe and theme. As opposed to the current Alexander book I’m reading which has a strong Halloween-in-Baton-Rouge vibe going on (and no, Holiday’s in and of itself isn’t another thing to add to the ‘things Alexander is known for’).

I wasn’t sure where I’d end up when I started the story – I liked it, then Theo appeared and I started to dislike it, then humor exploded, and stuff happened, and in the end I rather loved the story. Good solid lovable story.

October 24 2016

The Fall by Robin Alexander

The Fall
by Robin Alexander
Pages: 204
Date: November 15 2014
Publisher: Intaglio Publications
Series: None

Review
Rating: 5.75
Read: October 24 2016

This is my 12th book by Robin Alexander that I have read. Second one that I read on the 24th of October. Though that may or may not sound impressive, I feel the need to note that that is only 284 total pages (84 pages for ‘Ticket 1207’ and 204 pages for ‘The Fall’).

This book picks up that holiday theme, just like the previous book I read on the 24th, – there, ‘Ticket 1207’, it was a Christmas theme, here it is a Halloween theme. Similarly, certain other themes that Alexander likes continued to pop up – old wacky people (mom/grandma Savino; dad/grandpa Savino), set in Louisiana (here Baton Rouge), humor, and two of the main characters are in the 30 to 40 age range.

Unlike any previous Alexander that I have read (as far as I recall), though, there are also two characters in the 13 to 19 age range (17 going on 18). For you see, this is one of those double couple type books (like in ‘The War Within’ by Yolanda Wallace – which involved two women in their 70s, and two in their 20s). This book stars Noel Savino and Harper Guidry (niece of Noel), and Sunny and Lydia Chase (daughter of Sunny).

The book opens with Harper painting a badger, and Lydia nearby working up the courage to burst forward and be near Harper – for you see, Lydia fancies Harper. Though she ‘knows’ that Harper is straight. They quickly become friends - with Harper finding that she rather likes Lydia - as a friend. Also, somewhat less quickly, Harper’s sexual orientation begins to come into question, by by Harper herself, and by others around her. Harper and Lydia are the 17 to 18 year old 'couple'.

Then there’s Sunny and Noel. They meet for the first time through another Chase family member – Uncle Ethan (Sunny’s Uncle). Ethan, formerly a hairstylist, now forced to be retired due to car accident, lives with Sunny and Lydia. He’s quite dramatic and a bit of a character himself – constantly dressing up as various old Hollywood actresses (and constantly trying to get everyone who comes within his reach to allow him to paint their faces, do their hair, and dress them in dresses; he’s a little hard to take at first though he grows on me). So I was mentioning a first meeting. Ethan has a tooth issue, and Sunny drives Ethan to the nearest dentist. Ethan’s kind of fragile like, and so he drags Sunny into the examination room with him. Whereupon Ethan and Sunny meet . . . a woman wearing cat ears. For, you see, Noel normally deals with kids, though can fit in adults as well. So Sunny and Noel meet. Ethan gets gassed and babbles certain things Sunny might not wish Noel to immediately know. Sunny and Noel are the 30-40 year old 'couple'.

Meanwhile, the generation below Sunny and Noel continue their own form of flirtation – as Lydia and Harper continue their friendship.

The generation above Noel and Sunny involves grandpa/dad Joe and grandma/ma Inez Savino (I haven’t been tracking this, but this actually might be the first time I’ve read an Alexander book wherein both father and mother at this level (the grandparent level, other books have had living father and mother) are living, I could be wrong here). Joe’s retired and loves going out on his boat with his friend Jeff (‘taking the boat out’, if they happen to actually catch any fish, it changes to ‘went fishing’). Inez loves making gigantic meals and loading everyone’s plates to the point wherein it is hard to see someone on the other side of the table, past the plate. She also likes sitting in bushes and spying on her neighbors (see a wacky old person).

The extended Savino family also includes Mason and Corey (cousins of Harpers - neither large presences in the book), Mary (Harper’s mother), and Matthew (father of Mason and Corey - barely there sibling). Mary plays a slightly larger role in this bunch, what with being Harper’s mother; while Corey gets slightly more lines than the rest (except for Mary).

It took me awhile to have Uncle Ethan grow on me, but I rather liked everyone else of major importance (Harper, Noel, Sunny, Lydia, Inez). Great story all the way around. I actually liked seeing things from the perspective of 17 year olds (unexpected, that - since I'd only really experienced main characters in the 30s/40s from Alexander).

As I noted, this is the 12th book I’ve read by Alexander, and I believe that it is tied with ‘Dear Me’ as being my favorite Alexander books. And to think, I read 3 books in 2014, then took almost two years to read another. And now I’ve read 9 more – as of this writing, bookended on one side by 5.75 ‘Dear Me’, and 5.75 ‘The Fall’. To a certain extent, I like the fact that ‘Ticket 1207’ actually appears above ‘The Fall’ on my list, even though I’d read ‘The Fall’ second. Because now I don’t have to play the ‘two great books, bookends, stop now for another 2 years?’ game. I can just continue reading.

October 26 2016

Take Me Home by Lorelie Brown

Take Me Home
by Lorelie Brown
Pages: 110
Date: November 7 2016
Publisher: Riptide Publishing
Series: Belladonna Ink (2nd in series)

Review
Rating: 5.75 out of 5.0
Read: August 31 2016


How do I wait until November 7th to put up a review? mmphs.

Okay then - I'll just put notes here for now. Then.

Keighley and Brooke, sitting in a tree, kissing. Wait, there were not trees. hmms.

Keighley is 23 and an accountant. Brooke is somewhere around the same age and a tattoo artist. Book is from POV of Keighley.

A week and one day before Thanksgiving, Keighley is both looking forward to and cringing from the family gathering that will occur on Thanksgiving day. Because it is the all family party day. And while she loves her father, mother, and sister (17 year old Sierra), she doesn't particularly like her cousin Trisha, and especially doesn't like her fundamentalist aunt Daphne.

After asking her mother if they could just not invite Daphne and her side of the family, and becoming resigned to the idea that they will be joining the party, Keighley decides to get a ringer. Well, that's the word that would be used in a sporting context, not sure what to use here. Using a ringer is liking having a 'friendly' amateur competition between two companies, and one brings in a professional athlete and pretend that athlete is an employee. In this specific situation, Keighley decides on bringing a date to the party - a fake lesbian girlfriend. To thrust in the face of Daphne.

An advertisement on Craigslist is spotted. Pink haired tattoo artist ad - 'Feeling hemmed in by parental expectations? Are they disappointed by your sapphic proclivities? I can help! The only pay I want is the holiday meal!' Keighley contacts said artist, who goes by the name of 'Brooke', and a deal is struck.

There's some family events, dogs, angst/drama, meals and drinks, and lots of sex.

Kept on the edge of the seat I was. I couldn't stop reading. I gave the first book I read by Brown 6 stars. I want to give this one the same, though I can't really. While we learn a ton of information about the two main contestants in this game of pigeon (okay, I couldn't think of what to put there), but still, book is super short. Still, I'm on the edge of putting it on the six star shelf anyway.

All I Want for Christmas by Clare Lydon

All I Want for Christmas
by Clare Lydon
Pages: 258
Date: October 27 2015
Publisher: Custard Books
Series: All I Want (1)

Review
Rating: 2.25
Read: September 23 2016

I'm rating this book far off the current average, so it's fair enough to ask 'why'. So I better put something in this review box, eh?

Simple enough reason - and one of the main risks of writing things from only one perspective. In the 'I did this, then I did that' way, deep into this person's thoughts we went. And that simple reason is this: I just plainly did not like Tori, the main character. The others were just side characters during her journey through this book. It is true that it would be accurate to say that there were at least four important characters in this book, but only one has enough 'there' for a reader to get a good idea of who they might be. And, unfortunately, as already noted - I didn't like them.

Those four important characters are: Tori the narrator (27 year old who, because of the actions of a woman who was Tori's last important girlfriend (though not most recent ex), prompts Tori to go down the path this book follows - more later); Holly (27 year old roommate and long time friend of Tori's - to a certain extent a reader, as in me, learned mostly that she's super tall, otherwise I didn't learn much about her in this book); Melanie (the ex who is getting married); and finally Nicola (the woman who Tori kind of thinks of as being her true love - a former BFF (best friend forever) who 'went missing' from Tori's life when they share a kiss at the tender age of 16).

Which leads us to the plot. Picture it, November 25th - a woman learns that one of her ex's is engaged to be married. She, Tori, is currently single. Tori decides that she is going to change this situation - no not go after Melanie, no, she's going to change her single status. She's going to get a girlfriend by Christmas. A tall order considering she has no current prospects. So she goes on a bunch of on-line dating experiences (not sure if it is a positive or negative that none of the dates turned out to be stereotypically bad (or good), nor, for that matter, funny). So that's the plot. Get a girlfriend by Christmas.

This is the book that has lead me to take a break from romances. Because I'm tired of the lead up. That's what most romances are, a long ass lead up to a coupling then poof, let's read another long ass lead up. Which is somewhat ironic since that is why I read this book here, no not for the long ass thing, but because this is the first in a series that involves the same couple. So I'd finally get what I wanted - more time with the same couple after they become a couple. Problem being that I don't want to spend any more time with Tori. I've already spent too much time with her.

One last thought before I go - I might have to stop reading British books. I'm not sure if the things that kept pulling me out of this story were British English things, or just errors. It annoyed the hell out of me that the people in the book kept 'sat' instead of 'sitting'. mmphs.

We were sat on our bench at the top of our hill, looking up at the charcoal sky

- I would have written that as 'we were sitting on our bench . . . '. I'm the person who is wrong here, right? Well, regardless, that sat thing happened 96 times in this book - well no, the word appears 96 times, but then I actually read the omnibus version that also has books 2 and 3, so some of those sats might be in those books.

Holly was sat at her usual table with a few of her workmates when I walked in.

- Again I'm wrong to be annoyed by this, right? Well I'd have written that as 'Holly was sitting at her usual table . . .', but maybe that's wrong in all versions of English. Maybe 'was sat' is perfectly acceptable in American English and every other English out there. *shrugs*

I sat down on the sofa, but couldn't shake the nagging feeling that was sat right beside me.

- and I do not even know what that means. The second sat. What the bloody hell is going on here? A feeling sat beside her? Is that it? Oh. Right. Sorry, that's it. A feeling was sitting with her. A nagging feeling. Right. 'was sat'. Was . . . bloody sat. WAS SAT. AAARRGGGH

By the way, I'm sure the answer that will come back, if anyone does 'answer' my annoyance, would be 'well, that's dialect. The author was writing in dialect, and that's just how Tori would speak.' Fair enough. Bloody drove me mad, but fair enough.

She shifted across the sofa so she was sat next to me to emphasise her point.

- course it wasn't actually used in conversation but in the thoughts. Or something like that. I think these are supposed to be Tori's thoughts.

Forty minutes later, we were sat on a Tube, clutching cups of hot coffee, eyes wide open.

- That's horrible. Get on the train. And someone sits on you. They should have knocked them off. Whoever it was who sat on them. 'We were sat on'. Who sat on you? Was it the coffee. Did the coffee sit on them?

Sorry, I'm just being stupid and petty. I just . . . kind of hate Tori. So . . . I'm being stupid and petty.

Selfish full of herself Tori. Ah well. I have the omnibus so I'll probably read at least the second book in the story. Though I'd not otherwise.

Oh, and the whole Nicola thing was annoying.

September 24 2016

Twist of the Magi by Caren J. Werlinger

Twist of the Magi
by Caren J. Werlinger
Pages: 38
Date: November 5 2014
Publisher: Ylva Publishing
Series: None

Review
Rating: 3.5 out of 5.0
Read: May 16 2016

Nice enough story, I suppose. I didn't particularly like how passive Penny seemed, and how her affections so easily bounced around. Quite shallow, until she's basically slapped in the face by reality.

Probably a story I'd give around 3.5 stars to. Possibly 3.7.

May 16 2016

A Fashionably Dead Christmas by Robyn Peterman

A Fashionably Dead Christmas
by Robyn Peterman
Pages: 128
Date: December 15 2016
Publisher: Self
Series: Hot Damned (5th in series)

Review
Rating: 2.0 out of 5.0
Read: March 22 2016

I like holiday stories, I like Christmas stories, I seem to have an odd attraction to reading holiday family stories, and I like humor. There are series and authors in which my favorite thing in the series, or by the author, happen to be holiday stories.

This was an annoying, disagreeable mess.

And please, for the love of everything and anything, stop fucking going on and on about the super old vampires whose bodies keep accidentally falling out of their outfits. It wasn't exactly that interesting the first time (or 10 or 20 times) this little bit of 'humor' popped up. But it was bearable. But . . . do we really need the same humor beaten to death, mounted on the wall, taken down, unmounted, beaten some more, then mounted to the wall again?

Also, what the fuck are 'baby Jesus' figurines? The next is unrelated, specifically, to this story, but since I'm on 'baby Jesus' anyway - why the fuck do so many fucking people seem to prefer asking help from/praying to/worshiping baby Jesus as opposed to, oh, I don't know, non-baby Jesus? They just not want some 30-something dude's help? Prefer the help of a baby? For fuck sake.

March 22 2016

A Wolf for the Holidays by Bridget Essex

A Wolf for the Holidays
by Bridget Essex
Pages: 97
Date: November 22 2014
Publisher: Rose and Star Press

Review
Rating: 4.5 out of 5
Read: January 14 2015

A woman is once again stood-up by her girlfriend.  For the sixth time in six months, this girlfriend either forgets, arrives hours late, or sends a text message hours afterwards to indicate that they won't make dinner.  This time, it's Christmas Eve, and Mandy's made a special meal. She loves cooking. She loves showing her love through food.  But her girlfriend fails to arrive in time.  Then finally arrives hours late.  With a massive wolf.  As a present.  She doesn't apologize for missing dinner. No, she demands to know where it is.  Mandy finally gets up the courage to break up with her girlfriend.

Girlfriend leaves. Mandy looks down at the massive wolf with the intelligent eyes.  Looks around her tiny studio apartment.  Knows she can't keep the wolf.  Goes to sleep.  Wakes up to see a naked woman rummaging through her dresser looking for clothing.  Also, the wolf is missing.

Neat little story of unexpected occurrences, and unexpected love.